Lofty Affairs
‘THE LOFT’ TRAILER REVIEW BY METRO CREW
Five friends think they have a foolproof way to indulge in affairs without their families finding out when they buy an upscale apartment to share. But their lives begin to unravel when they find a dead woman in the loft — jeopardizing their marriages and causing them to question their friendships. It looks like we’re supposed to sympathize with these cheating bros — but they’re, well, cheating bros, so we think they had it coming. While we’re divided on how interesting we think the plot is, we are intrigued enough to wonder who is behind the murder. The film stars James Marsden, Karl Urban and Wentworth Miller. The Loft opens Jan. 30 in wide release. >>
JAMES: So, basically they have a loft where anything can happen?
CHRISTINA: Yeah, it seems like they just wanted a place where they can have affairs.
JAMES: Like a motel.
JAIMIE: But classier.
JAMES: So it’s like a shared space kind of thing? One guy goes in and uses it and then murders someone and then when someone else comes in, they have to clean up the body.
NICOLE: It seems like a secret society.
JAIMIE: Who cleans their sheets?
PAIGE: There are just so many holes in this “no one will know about the apartment we own together” plan.
NICOLE: I totally want to see this.
JAIMIE: I don’t even want to see this when it’s on TV.
NICOLE: I think that crazy blonde girl is going to end up being a serial killer.
CHRISTINA: Yeah, it kind of seems like they are being framed. Or maybe it is one of the friends.
JAIMIE: Guys! This is about a bunch of bros who just wanted to get it on, bought their own apartment, and now they are being punished for it.
CHRISTINA: That’s why it’s awesome — they are being punished for it.
PAIGE: There are just too many holes in this plan. It is impossible that nobody would notice five people going in and out of this building with different women.
JAMES: It doesn’t seem that outlandish, though. A Saturday evening, basically.
PAIGE: Also, how would they never bump into each other?
CHRISTINA: They probably wouldn’t really care if they walked in on each other. Maybe they have a schedule. It’s like a co-working space. I think the main guy (Karl Urban) who seems to be planning everything seems kind of sketch.
NICOLE: I want to watch this. I want to see how many people this lady kills. I think the girl with the long hair is the one that is killing all these people.
PAIGE: This trailer is set up to be like, “These poor bros who can’t have an affair in peace. They are so distressed, let’s feel bad for them.”
NICOLE: I don’t feel bad for them.
CHRISTINA: I kind of just want to see them have their downfall.
NICOLE: I think that she is just going to kill them all off. And then in the last scene, James Marsden is going to get tortured and it’s going to be done.
JAIMIE: This is just so comical! I want to know what happens, but I don’t want to have to watch the whole thing. So I am going to wait until somebody updates the Wikipedia article with the plot, and then find out that way.
