Another Unnecessary Sequel

Metro-082616-TrailerReview

‘MECHANIC: RESURRECTION’ TRAILER REVIEW BY METRO CREW

It’s been years since former elite hitman Arthur Bishop (Jason Statham) put his past behind him. But he’s forced out of retirement when the woman he loves is kidnapped — and the terms are that he must complete three assassinations. Does this plot sound familiar? We thought so, too. It sounds pretty much just like every other action reboot that has come out recently, and we have no desire to sit through it.

Mechanic: Resurrection opens in wide release Aug. 26.

CHRISTINA: This movie looks so boring. I completely lost interest almost immediately. Why is it that so many action films seem to be just action-porn? Like, they can’t seem to get a good plot in there to go with. They all look the same to me. Yawn.

JAIMIE: Yeah, you know what? Couldn’t even make it through to the end of the trailer. How is this a movie? And how is this a movie that warrants a sequel? I can’t even.

NICOLE: Zero interest in seeing this movie. I didn’t see the first one, either … It seems like one of those films that is so generic.

CHRISTINA: Movies like this can get by if they at least have some great talent — but this one’s just got Jason Statham and Jessica Alba. I don’t find either of them that interesting. They’re the kind of actors you forget about until they pop up in a movie.

PAIGE: I’ve never really found Jason Statham that charismatic. He’s like the bald tough guy you call in to help get things straightened out one-third of the way into a movie, not the star of the show. (I realize I am in the minority in thinking this.)

JAIMIE: Jessica Alba looks exactly as she did years ago when I first saw her in a movie in … middle school, maybe. Usually that would be a good thing — everyone wants to maintain their youth. For her, though, I feel like it does not do her any favors. She still looks like a teenage girl, now cavorting around with nobody’s favorite bald guy Jason Statham.

PAIGE: It’s kind of amazing how many reboots, sequels and remakes have come out this year alone. And pretty much all of them have bombed. How does this stand out from all the other “brooding white assassin” action films that have come out this year? There was Jason Bourne, there’s going to be Jack Reacher, there’s probably like eight other guys that I just don’t remember. I would be surprised if this movie were the one that defied the odds.

What they really should do to liven up the genre is having the brooding assassin showdown, where the Mechanic takes on Jason Bourne and the Transporter and like, all of them duke it out in a bloody battle to the death. You cannot deny that would enliven the genre.