Superheroes Return



Genius billionaire playboy philanthropist Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) attempts to retire from the Iron Man life by inventing a self-sufficient peacekeeping program — Ultron (James Spader). Unfortunately, Ultron thinks the best way to keep the peace is by wiping out humanity altogether. The Avengers — including Captain America (Chris Evans) and Thor (Chris Hemsworth) — reassemble to stop him. But Ultron knows exactly how to exploit the their weaknesses, and he may be more than a match for Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. Avengers: Age of Ultron opens in wide release May 1.

PAIGE: I’m very doubtful that this movie is going to be able to juggle this many characters. We’re going to end up with another “Well, let’s put Hawkeye in this, but we don’t have time to really give him a personality, so let’s just brainwash him to avoid dealing with that” situation. I know there will be moments — like Thor hitting Cap’s shield like a baseball — that will be so badass I’ll just die right there. But I don’t think this is going to be like, Winter Soldier-level great.

NICOLE: I have faith in you, Joss Whedon. I believe that this film will overcome the obstacle of having so many “main” characters to become one of the greats. Seriously, though, I feel like there are a dozen characters to keep track of.

JAIMIE: I am excited to see this movie, but there’s something about Marvel movie trailers that leave me feeling so, so confused most of the time. Maybe it’s because I don’t follow the characters and stories outside of the films, but I feel like (the trailer) was just an amalgamation of madness.

CHRISTINA: At the risk of Paige hating me forever, I have never seen any Avengers movie, or any of those other movies that have any of these superheroes in them. That said, even for someone who doesn’t know these characters, I thought that this looked pretty decent, and it almost made me wish I had watched all of the previous movies.

JAMES: Anyone see the original Superman movies with Christopher Reeves? There’s a battle in the streets of Metropolis. Special effects were limited, but the city felt real and alive. Folks were in danger at every turn. In the Avengers‘ universe, entire city blocks get destroyed, but there isn’t a civilian in sight. It makes this universe seem like nothing more than a series of elaborate hideouts, airships, headquarters and prefabricated battlegrounds.

NICOLE: I am so excited to watch Chris Hemsworth in all his muscular glory. And also, unpopular opinion, Chris Evans is meh.

PAIGE: Your opinion is unpopular because it’s WRONG. Chris Evans is amazing. Those blue eyes! That physique! Everything about him! Meeting him in person must be like meeting a god. Though I do admit his affection for growing a beard as soon as he’s done filming anything is a little … not so amazing.

JAMES: Not exactly a Chris Evans hater, but I thought he was more interesting as Skinny Captain. Before he became a hero. I guess all these Marvel movies have better setups than payoffs. I always fall asleep during the climactic battles.

JAIMIE: The most overrated person in the Avengers franchise is Robert Downey Jr. He was so likable for a period of time, during his comeback period, and now, just like Johnny Depp, he’s somehow managed to morph every character into the same persona.

PAIGE: I agree that Robert Downey Jr. has taken Tony Stark and basically subverted his character into his own persona, which also drives me nuts because Iron Man used to be my favorite until he became too … RDJ.

CHRISTINA: OK, I haven’t seen Iron Man, but I love Robert Downey Jr. and I refuse to believe that he is overrated. He is just so great. And really, he’s been cashing in on this same persona for probably most of his career.

JAIMIE: I’m mostly excited to see Chris Hemsworth. I don’t find him attractive, at all. In fact, his physique is really kind of just scary. But after reading his GQ cover story, I’m a believer. ( chrishemsworth)

JAMES: They say a superhero flick is only as good as its villain, and right now, Ultron is kinda dull. All the little drones he summons seem harmless. The Hulk basically plucks and tosses them around like weeds. There’d be more suspense if the Hulk arm-wrestled Iron Man in an antique shop with a nervous owner looking on.

PAIGE: I’m much less interested in how they resolve the whole Ultron thing and the introduction of Quicksilver/ Scarlet Witch than I am in how they start setting up Civil War in this film between Cap and Iron Man. Having seen Winter Soldier nine times, you could say I am, ah, very invested in that particular story thread. I could probably blather on about this movie and Marvel for the next 400 years, so it’s probably best I just stop here while it still can be considered normal.